The last couple of days there have been a few comments on my Twitter feed about women claiming that they like the idea of a 'rape fantasy'
For one of my friends this has hit home quite hard as she has in fact been raped for real and she could tell you it certainly is no fantasy , a total nightmare from hell actually and something that has changed her life forever.
I think the phrase 'rape fantasy' is the wrong choice of words. While several women ,(thanks I feel to 50 shades) have the fantasy of being tied up , whipped , controlled and maybe indulge in a bit of breath play there is a world of difference between 'subs and doms' and rape.
Rape is non consensual , the victim does not have a choice , there are no 'safe words' and sometimes weapons are used .It is purely motivated by fear and violence and not both parties are enjoying it.
Usually when indulging in sub and dom activity there has been a bit of discussion beforehand . Things that are acceptable and things that definitely are not. You would do this (usually) with someone that you trust and have an existing relationship with . It's not something , I feel , that you would do on a one night stand or in the early stages of a relationship.
I'm sure that the women who are claiming to like the idea of a 'rape fantasy' in fact would like no such thing in real life and I really hope that they never get the chance to find out . xxx
If you have been affected by rape or abuse please contact www.rapeandabuseline.co.uk/ where they help both women and men.
