ghostbusters

There’s a new phrase around these days ‘being ghosted’ basically it means when you have been in a relationship with someone for a while , often an intimate relationship and then they vanish into thin air , don’t reply to calls , messages , vanish from your social media ....as if they never existed , like a ghost

I might be being naive but isn’t that what was formally known as being dumped and ignored ? Does it need a new name ? Surely this has been going on since dating began ? 

Talk about reinventing the wheel 😂 xx

Oh no she didn’t .......

Audience Participation 

2 words to strike fear deep inside me , 2 words I never want to see on a theatre programme , 2 words that will have my stomach churning throughout a performance 
Id like to say this is a recent thing but more of that later.

In recent times when going to the theatre I have tried to make sure that seats are chosen in safe places , not on the aisles and certainly not on the front row 
My mum found out that this doesn’t always work though when we went to see ‘Cats’ in London 
We thought we had safe seats , not knowing that the centre stage revolved and as a result we were actually in the front row , resulting in the Jack the lad cat (can’t remember his name) standing on the stage ,exclaiming “oh Mother , you came” , bouncing over to Mum and proceeding to hug her , transferring his grease painted whiskers onto her face !! We also had various ‘cats’ crawling round our legs , purring and rubbing their faces up our legs 
Another time we settled down for a comedy version of Hamlet and I ended up with a tomato sauce covered (supposed to be blood) Hamlet dying whilst sitting on my lap 
Nope , not the most enjoyable night at the theatre for me !!
So here does this hatred for audience participation come from you ask ? 

It was the Measley Germs at the village hall 

Yes , you read that right 
When I was very young , I think I was about 3 , theatre groups used to put on small shows in the village hall that I went to play group in.I can remember going there with Mum , Dad and my 2 Brothers and there it began.

If I’m honest I can’t remember the storyline , just the traumatic part . The play was in some part about measles (???) and the scary part was that each child was given a packet of red dot stickers and at a certain point in the performance we had to stick as many of these onto our skin as possible so the measley germs didn’t get us.
Now this caused me to panic , I really did think I was going to get measles if I wasn’t quick enough , if I didn’t put enough stickers on , I think by this time I was in tears as the actors came amongst the audience to catch any children not properly stickered.
And this one play from about 42 years ago is the reason I hate audience participation , why I hated seeing Rod Hull and Emu , why I don’t like Panto ,why singalong shows are torture , I wonder if any of the actors in this show know the lasting impact they have had on me !! 
All together now “Oh no they don’t “ xx 

Bras

Bras .......right I’ve got the attention of many males out there although I suspect that whilst you do appreciate a pretty bra you’re probably keener on what is inside it , right? 

I can remember my first bra buying experience being a bit embarrassing, getting a ‘My First Bra’ from Marks & Spencer and trying to pretend it wasn’t for me when my Mum paid for it. If I had known then that they weren’t the most comfortable garments ever made then I think I would have stuck to my sensible vest for a while longer .

And if anything the bra buying experience has got even more annoying as the years have gone by . If you are dainty and have an average size chest then I suppose it is a fairly painless experience, you can buy bras from anywhere , even when you are doing a weekly shop in Tesco or Asda . Your bra will fit nicely , be reasonably priced and you will have a wide range of pretty styles , colours and patterns to choose from.
However ......

If you have a larger chest then that’s where it becomes trickier 
You can get matronly boulder holders , keeping everything upright and facing forwards , not sexy at all for anyone under about 70 years old 
If you want a pretty bra , various colours , materials , styles in larger sizes it’s harder to find . Obviously you can get whatever you’d like if you are prepared to pay the equivalent of a small countries national debt on one , you can get them custom made , perfect fit ,in any material .
High street stores don’t really have the choice for larger chests so online is the obvious answer .
I personally found a style of bra that I loved , it was comfortable, pretty , came in several different colours and wasn’t hideously expensive ....so what’s they problem you say ? 
They’ve discontinued making them !!! 

So now the search is on for the next comfortable bra , one that won’t make me feel like I have a tiger sitting in my chest or risk falling out of !! 
So far I have ordered 6 different styles and 2 have been returned already, fingers crossed that at least one of the other 4 will be suitable !!

Men have it relatively easy , holding their precious jewels where they are meant to be and we’ve all seen guys standing there having a quick rearranging session when they don’t think anyone can see them .
Somehow I don’t think us women could get away with rearranging our boobs in the middle of Tesco’s ......xx

Baybeee , baybeee , baybeeeeeee aaaargh

I’m not keen on children , I mean I’d never hurt one , I just don’t particularly like spending time with them 
As a woman in her mid 40s I apparently should have had the last alarm ringing from my body clock , telling me to reproduce now before it’s too late but I have turned off that alarm and taken out its batteries !! 
People say ‘Oh you’d love kids if they were your own’ which I seriously doubt 
If I dislike spending a few hours in the company of small people , why would I want to spend 24/7 with them for the next few years ?
When you babysit , at least you have the comfort that the parents will be back before too long 
I do babysit my Nephews and I think they like me , well unless I’m telling them to put their shoes away , get changed out if their uniforms or eat their dinner ....okay maybe they actually don’t like me !! 
I never liked the vomit phase which my eldest Nephew went through, strangely enough it happened most times that I held him , but I have managed in life to never change a poopy nappy , only a wet one once 

When friends or relatives put pictures of their newborn kids or Grandkids on Facebook , I tick ‘like’ and wish my Congratulations, stopping myself from writing ‘oh my god , that kid is UGLY’ , as all babies are odd looking aren’t they . I can think of only a handful of human babies that I have thought were okay looking but literally hundreds of felines or canines !!
I will only visit a new baby if it’s a relative that I really have to see and then avoid holding the baby wherever possible 

On the other hand , if anyone puts a photo up of their new puppy , kitten or adult animal then I am the first to squeal how completely GORGEOUS it is , what’s its name , breed , Birthday and when can I come round for cuddles ?

So I DO have a maternal streak in me , just not for human babies 
I have sat up all night with poorly cats or dogs , making sure they are okay , I clean up vomit and poop from them when necessary , I will spend all of my time with them , I love them unconditionally and will do anything for them to give them the best life possible .

So it’s a no from me towards human babies but I’ll have all of the puppy , kitten , cat , dog , ferret , rabbit , guinea pig cuddles that I possibly can !! xx 

Love Island ? ZZZzzzzzzzzzzzz

I decided that I wanted to write a blog post about ‘Love Island’ , the only problem with this is that I’d only ever seen apart of an episode of a celebrity version years ago but as it is now the most watched show on ITV2 I thought I’d find out why .

The idea of the show is that single people live  together on an island , in villas and ‘couple up’ , the couple that is the most popular in the end wins money and probably a chance to be a panellist on other ITV2 shows (or that’s how it seems ) 

The competitors  seem to all be chosen for their looks , the women are pouty , perfectly proportioned, with long hair just right for flicking suggestively when the need arises .

The men , six packs , tans, perfectly styled hair and white teeth .

In the episode I tuned in for there seems to be a theme 

One guy was ‘putting his guts on the table’ and telling a girl that he fancied her as well as a girl that he had been hanging around with for a while and he was undecided about which of them he wanted to ‘couple’ with .

The girl then said that she had feelings for someone else as well as him and so he went back to the first girl .

This happened with another couple and one was even kissing her ‘maybe 2nd choice , maybe 1st choice ‘ man in front of her other option !! 

I have since seen that the first undecided guy has dumped his original girl but I’m sure there will be another new addition to the island that will grab his attention before too long 

I have watched reality tv shows before , I watched most series of Big Brother and the early seasons of Towie , so I’m not anti reality tv  , but the thing that got me with Love Island is it’s just about ‘love’ , pairing up , kissing or talking about love , pairing up and kissing .There doesn’t seem to be any other topic of conversation at all .

Either they are talking about their own pairings or they are dissecting the others , giving advice or gossiping, and that’s what bores me . Maybe this is the editing , maybe they do have other things to talk about but it’s not shown.

In the early seasons of Big Brother you had a variety of people , ages , weights , backgrounds , political views etc 

They talked about a variety of things , they did varying tasks and that was what made it interesting 

I’m afraid Love Island is just like eavesdropping in a Ladies loo at a club on a Saturday night , just ‘he said that , she did this , he doesn’t love me anymore , he cheated on her ‘ and I really don’t know how anyone watches this for an hour every evening 

So I gave it a shot , I can say that I don’t like it , it bores me but I hope that all of the contestants find what they are looking for , be it love or that ITV2 job !! XX

Grrrrrrrrrr

Men get in bad moods and so do women , that’s life 
I worry when people are cheerful all of the time , I half expect them to snap and turn into a psychopath from keeping everything inside and smiling all of the time.

But men are allowed to be in a bad mood in a totally different way to women 
When a man is in a bad mood he can slam about , swear , moan , sulk or just generally do his best impression of Hulk , all green anger oozing out everywhere and that’s okay.

When a woman is in a bad mood 
“Is it that time of the month?”
“Oooh PMS?!”
Yes , women are only allowed to be in a bad mood if it is hormonal, they are not just allowed to be grumpy because they’ve been annoyed or upset , oh no !!! 

Women are totally 100% ruled by their menstrual cycle , they don’t have the logic or reasoning to be argumentative at any other  time of the month 

Rubbish 
Please men (and some other women) , we are allowed to have days where we are annoyed because we are annoyed , nothing to do with whatever is going on inside us , we can moan , shout and swear at random times of the month just as well as men can (sometimes better!!) 
So please try and be less ignorant and just pass us some cake and wine (that works at any time of the month) xx

Selfish Selfies

I come from the generation that didn’t grow up with smart phones ( no mobile phones at all in fact) 
The internet wasn’t even a thing for me until I was in my 20s , a fact that my Nephews can’t get their heads around 
So the idea of taking picture after picture after picture of myself , pouting and posing isn’t one that comes completely naturally 
Yes I admit I have taken a selfie or 2 , added dog ears and other filters from snapchat and shared them occasionally on social media but I’m certainly not someone who feels the need to capture a selfie at every possible opportunity 

I recently read about people who have taken selfies to an extreme , a disrespectful extreme 
People are taking selfies at places where they really shouldn’t be , posing on the railway tracks at Auschwitz with hashtags that just smack of stupidity and even one who decided that the inside of the gas chambers would be a good backdrop despite photos not being encouraged in there , let alone pouty , vain selfies 

Others have posed their way around Anne Franks house and several Holocaust memorials , thumbs up , inane grins on their faces even some putting their middle fingers up 
The lack of respect is just disgusting but these teens don’t seem to see anything wrong in it 
Also in the article I read were stories (and accompanying pictures) of people pouting next to a relatives open coffin , while passing a road traffic accident or with a homeless person asleep in the shot 

I hope that these people are in the minority and most people just like snapping away in front of the mirror and adding filters to pass a bit of time but who knows , maybe we will have people trying to capture more and more things that they really shouldn’t xx